(Out of the blue) "Welp, we're gonna need some rocket boots if we ever want to go to the desert!"
Me (thinking out loud): Okay, so I'll need baking soda. . .
Xander: I want that! I like soda and I LOOOOVE bacon!
Xander: Let's just go ahead and get doughnuts for tomorrow.
Me: What's tomorrow?
Xander: The day after today!
(His dog, Raja, jumped up on him while they were playing) "Raja! How dare you?! I thought we were friends! I would NEVER do something like that to you!"
Xander: Mommy, can I put on handsome shorts to go out in the rain?
~walks out of his room wearing navy athletic shorts
(Tilted his head to give me a kiss) "That's a married kiss. Like when they kiss really hard because they're so excited to be married."
"Mommy, you should wear makeup to be pretty. And a big bow on your head! I bet Piper will let you borrow one."